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Hail the Sultan of Submissions, Lance Winslow!I tip my mouse to the Grand Pooh-Bah of Punditry! How does he do it? Abatement of Corruption in CongressWell it appears that the corruption in Congress is so pervasive that the real problem now is not only getting rid of all the maggots and flies, but all the crap too. It appears that the Blob of Bureaucracy has turned OUR government into a business for sale to the highest bidder and the mere citizens who supposedly own it cannot even get a word in edge wise Abatement of Illegal Aliens Thru Flooding and Storm Weather WarfareAs the new President comes into office in Mexico and now President Vincent Fox leaves office for riches due to connections; we may see a paradigm shift towards socialism or even communism? Think I am crazy? Financial Wizardry at Work: Frozen Money TechnologyThanks to the ingenuity of Louisiana Democrat William Jefferson, several innovations have been introduced to keep your money safe. Jefferson expanded the idea of cold, hard cash, and took it one step further by freezing it, thereby causing his own cash to become even colder and harder. Cranelegs Top Ten Reasons Why We Are DoomedI can't take it any more. I've gotta find me a cave and fast. I think the end is near and here's why. Feed Dog Food to All the LawyersObviously they are not happy living in this world and scraping the cream of society for their own personal gain without providing any productivity to our noble civilization in anyway. Jokes for Jay Leno 02: President BushThis is the second in a series to help Jay Leno find jokes for the Tonight Show. We focus on news about President Bush. Abandoning Crude Oil in 2150It appears at the current rate of new technologies and considering our nations growth, illegal immigrant population increases and demand issues that we may actually break our addiction to oil by somewhere around the year 2150 if all goes perfect. Jokes from the News for Jay Leno 01: Police JokesI decided that Jay Leno needs all the help he can get so I wrote up a few jokes from the news. The first jokes in this Joke for Jay Leno Series are Police Jokes. Business Faux Pas: Mustard On Your Tie and Poppy Seeds In Your TeethSo, you think you have it all together? Double check to be sure. Dig a Giant Ditch on the US-Mexican Border; Use the Dirt to Fill in New OrleansOkay here is the deal, we have a huge problem with New Orleans in that the water has mostly all drained out and what is left is totally toxic. The whole area should be a Superfund Site, yet what do we do now? Polite Tips of Getting Rid of a Bible ThumperHave you ever had someone come to your door and want to share their religion to you; sounds really nice doesn't it? Indeed, they love their religion and their rendition of their God so much that they are willing to share their psychotic state of bliss with you and your family. How to Get Rid of a Bible Thumper ManiacDo you have acquaintances that are so into the "God Thing" that they are completely looped and borderline psychotic? In psychology we often discuss those who have invisible friends. When one is young it is not such a huge issue, but over the age of 12 well there might be a problem there you see? Yet, we have huge groups and churches swearing that they are talking to God. Computer Intimacy Problems!While reading an article about the growing list of security vulnerabilities on Macs, I was suddenly struck by the similarities between digital connections and personal relationships.Is it time to send your computer to see Dr. Phil? I Heard It From Some Guy In A Pub ...Used to be you could count on the information you picked up, say in a bar, or listening to other people's conversations at work, or on the bus or subway. Frankly, I think someone who's been drinking all day in a bar is as likely to tell you the truth as anyone … Tech Support – "#!@&"sWarning: I'm not in a good mood. This may not be pleasant. Rise of the MachinesLost at C.P.U.... Do I Know Anything? I Don't KnowI don't know how this article found its way from my mind to this place. Humor: What to Tell Your Wife and What Kids and Game-Show Contestants SayStock answers to your wife can save you time and explanations. Some funny answers that kids gave on science tests. Some funny answers given on England’s Family Fortunes which is the equivalent to our Family Feud. Why you should get a horse and build your herd. The Origins Of Spring-Cleaning, Or Along Came EveI always know when April makes its yearly debut without consulting the calendar because my wife usually says, "Let’s clean out the garage today." Trust me on this one, it is no April fool’s joke, but someone gets fooled. And believe me, I’m just not anybody’s fool. I’m my wife’s fool. Why We Have Not Caught Osama bin Laden YetDo you ever wonder why we have not caught up with the chief International Terrorist who caused the 911 Attacks on the United States of America yet? Well I heard it thru the grape vine that Osama bin Laden is dressing like a woman and has gotten a boob job. The Canadian Tire Guy Must be Stopped!The Canadian Tire Guy is arguably the most irritating, grinding teeth inducing corporate spokesperson that the Canadian viewing public has ever had to endure. We need to kill this guy off before his product plugging intrusions get completely out of control! How to Quit WritingLast week, I decided to quit writing. Tired of rejection, tired of being a slave to words and phrases, I decided it was time I straightened out my life. Humor - Hosting A RoastEverybody loves a good roast, of people that is. If you're planning to run one yourself, there are some tips that you better follow if you want it to go off without a hitch. Humor - The Funniest People Of All TimeThroughout history there have been funnymen who have entertained us like no others. We take a look at just a few of the greatest comedy acts of all time. Belly Dancing Bloopers! What Can I Say? If it Could Happen, it Did Happen to Me!Things that heppen to Belly Daners when performing that are unexpected when looked back on are a great source of humurous memories and great stories to share. I Heart Dave BarryI was surfing around, minding my own business when, all of a sudden, I came upon it. A HUMOR SITE! Top Ten Reasons David Letterman Visits the Hello Deli and Rupert JeeDave Letterman likes to get out of the studio when he is not tied down to his desk. He escapes to Rupert Jee’s Hello Deli. The Family BedThere's an old tradition in Ireland, the wake bed, a family bed where the dead are waked. Well, the family bed takes on a whole new meaning when you have children: the awake bed! NSA May be Wagging the Dog with New Spying PoliciesWhite House spokesman Tony Snow has announced three new policy changes which will be enacted by the National Security Agency. His announcement, however, is not causing much concern about invasion of privacy. The NSA will start monitoring all messages contained within fortune cookies.Records: 271-300 from 466