Change Your Words - Change the Outcome of Your Conversation
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Send to a friend by YMAuthor: Dorothy M. Neddermeyer, PhD
Although research reveals choice of words has a mere 7% impact on the outcome of a conversation, there are some words everyone seems to have a negative reaction to albeit in different intensity.
Although research reveals choice of words has a mere 7% impact on the out come of a conversation, there are some words everyone seems to have a negative reaction to albeit in different intensity.
These words can best be described as ‘Fire Cracker Words,’ because like a fire cracker once it is lit, one never knows whether it will go off or sit and smolder for awhile and then go off or not go off at all. Therefore, to ensure a smooth communication avoiding these ‘Fire Cracker’ words is paramount.
The following words and their alternatives will enhance your communication effectiveness.
Fire Cracker Word: You Should or You Shouldn’t
More Effective Statement: If you want_______, You need to______. In the future, please ___________.
Fire Cracker Word: You have to (must)______.
More Effective Statement: If you want_____, You will need to_____.
Fire Cracker Word: Why don’t/didn’t you___?
More Effective Statement: Ask questions without using Why: When, What, Where, Who, Which, How
Fire Cracker Word: You never______.
More Effective Statement: You usually_______.
Fire Cracker Word: You always_______.
More Effective Statement: You seldom________.
Fire Cracker Word: If only you________.
More Effective Statement: In the future, if_____, please________.
Fire Cracker Word: Yes, But
More Effective Statement: Paraphrase back what you heard (Pause. Take a short breath. Give an explanation. Avoid giving excuses.
The emotional impact of words has been studied by many philosophers. It has been determined the words where created for the user to maintain control and/or manipulate. While we all have unwittingly used these words with no intent to maintain control or manipulate the reaction to the words lies within the receiver and not the person using the words. Therefore, consider your listener and avoid using words, which universally have a frequent negative result. In so doing, your interactions will improve effortlessly and easily.
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